Adjusting hell

I decided to delete my shibari ropes set after spending one hour trying IN VAIN to adjust it. The process was just killing these old and tired eyes of mine and I finally gave up looking good in ropes. Bax boots have this auto-adjust feature that seems to work fine and I sincerely hope that future will bring us restraints supporting the same technology. Marine did and does a fantastic job and I proudly leave my keys out the wonderful serious shackles she had created more often than caution would allow it but yes, please pretty please, give us stuff that we can put on right away.

I sure know nothing about scripting and building and merely give my user point of view here. I am certain that technology and the way SL works today can’t enable creators to work the way they would like to and give birth to the perfect tools they would love to offer us.

I just want to look good in ropes and not kill my eyes trying to reach this goal.

And again, I love everything Marine does. Besides her blog is full of great information and when she wears what she created, well, let just say that things suddenly get very very interesting.

But I still want to look good in ropes.

/me pouts.

Sunday bloody Sunday

Sunday evening in grey Paris and I have to understand that my sweet Gabrille won’t come back in SL, at least not soon in spite of the fact that she didn’t turn off her profile yet .

My lovely Voltek comes less and less often being kept really busy by RL, a good thing she still has a tiers to pay so we have a chance to meet once in a month and express how we miss each other. Her beautiful garden, the new wonderful house she built all look empty now and the magic she puts in everything she touches or does gradually fades away.

Beverly granted me the honor of becoming a warden in her new sim and I love to go there, to rest on the beach listening to the song of the tide and thinking about the dear ones who chose to go away. Beverly and I had some binding fun recently and it is hard to express how pleasant and exciting sharing bondage with such a love is. I still owe her more than 100 hours in bondage because I lost at the simple yet wicked card game she had installed and being in the mood I am now, I definitely wouldn’t mind finding myself bound and left alone somewhere no one could find me. Beverly and I share the same feelings about how certain things should be done when capturing someone and we both definitely enjoy bondage for the sake of it.

She is a true love but I sadly have to admit that the kind of SL breakdown I am experiencing now prevents me from enjoying what this virtual world has to offer the way I am supposed to. I feel like a ghost and certainly must be a very disappointing piece of avatar.

 Well, I managed to kick my latex ass bad enough to fill this blog with entries again so I guess that the future doesn’t look that gloomy.

Back alive and kickin’

Well, I guess that saying sorry for the delay won’t be enough as this delay should be capped with an extremely huge and bold D. What can I say folks, RL and some more RL, long days and short evenings.

So I had my age verified, my account verified and I updated the viewer. So far the only interesting stuff I saw in this new adult continent are the secret spots Voltek managed to discover during our first visit, an underwater cave with some magic fauna and a reservoir full of surprises where a giant toad is still left to be captured.

I really enjoyed this first visit, flying over empty plains and whispering forests in the wind, roaming along rivers which grassy banks were still clubs and marina free.

I went back since, only to find a collection of your typical porno a go-go malls and resorts crammed in between discos and clubs bathed in all their neon glory.

A good thing most of my favourite sims didn’t have to move there.

Go west young avatar and grow with the virtual country before it’s too late.

I consider myself old enough !

So a new continent is born to welcome all adult activities.

So people who won’t have been checked before won’t be able to search for nor access adult tagged sims.

So a single tiny piece of land devoted to adult activities will have the whole sim where it is located tagged as adult.

All these changes and some others will apply as soon as the new viewer will be available. Some people already took some drastic steps to express their opinion on the matter as a well known shop owner who decided to abruptly cease all business in sl and left giving away all the fine products she took so many years to craft.

I sincerely don’t think these new sl laws will have a great impact on my virtual life as most of the places I visit are not located on a continent and are entirely devoted to these peculiar games we bunch of perverts seem to enjoy.

My profile has been checked already through money information and I shouldn’t experience any difficulty searching for and accessing adult themed locations.

Though I don’t belong to the “proud parents” category, I do fully agree with the whole idea of preventing kids and teenagers from wandering in places where they shouldn’t.

So, why do I feel nervous and rather disturbed by this new direction Linden has decided to take ?

I love sl because it allows me to live the multi sided life that rl doesn’t allow me to live, an existence of different colors, a quilt which harmony is solely forged by my own will, desire and my ability to respect the privacy and sensitivity of my virtual neighbors.

I consider myself old enough to be able to refrain some of my needs, words and actions when I know or feel that there is a chance that they could offend someone else.

I consider myself old enough to be able to adapt my behavior and my attitude to my environment.

I consider myself old enough to understand and definitely respect the fact that other people don’t share or have difficulties to accept the way I see and do things and I am always extremely careful not to offend their sigh nor their judgment.

I definitely need no one to tell me nor to remind me where, when and how I must adjust myself in order to fit in the set.

Besides, I consider myself old enough to leave a sim where I feel uncomfortable or to mute a person whose actions and words I find offensive. I would never think of asking Linden to delete these sims nor to ban these people or worse, to park them in some remote parcel out of my sight.

I wouldn’t but apparently some other people would and in fact did.

Rezzday

Time flies so fast.

Tomorrow is going to be my first rezzday and it is so hard for me to imagine that I already spent a full year in sl.

I met so many wonderful people here and made so many new friends that thanking each of these lovely persons for just being who they are and for all the joy they filled my heart with would definitely take another blog to be created. So I guess and sure hope that this big and sincere THANK YOU will be capped enough to express my gratitude to all of you great avatars who found the time and the patience to cope with this weird girl.

I hug you all so tight.

I love you all so much.

THANK YOU

There is no place like home

Most of my friends here have a place they can call home.

I know that living somewhere in sl allows you to enjoy the intimacy and the privacy that most of public sims can’t provide but, in spite of all the good things that I have been told about getting your own place, I have to admit that I still feel reluctant about making this big step.

I have no problem to financially help Linden staff to maintain their lovely creation as I am amazed that one can actually enjoy almost everything sl has to offer for free.

What bugs me is the fact that you have to pay more than once to eventually own nothing.

To me buying a place means that you can afford it right away and it’s yours or that you keep on paying for a certain amount of time until you enjoy it’s full ownership.

Well, here in sl, no matter you purchased the land or not, you still have to pay a tiers as long as you live there.

To me, subscribing to a website means that the money spent on a monthly basis to keep my account activated will allow me to get a full and free access to all the services that this site provides.

Getting a sl premium account or logging in for free doesn’t make any difference when it comes to acquire some substantial piece of land .You still have to pay for it and you still have to pay the tiers. We all know that the free 512 sqm such an account gives you rapidly prove to be really unsatisfactory as far as surface and prims allowance are concerned.

I know that I may not clearly view all the various elements that maybe would help me to adopt another point of view on this matter but, as far as I am concerned, renting seems to be the most reasonable solution.

Now let see: do I rent land to some nice individual with the risk that one day my landlord decides to give up on sl thus leaving me homeless or do I rent directly to Linden (if possible) with the risk that the company decides to close business thus leaving me not only homeless but also naked, bald, shapeless, skinned and totally desperate.

Oh my, is paranoid my second name or am I right to ask myself all these silly questions ?

I just need an aspirin badly.

Bunny Hop

Sorry for not blogging as often as I sincerely would love to but various factors, both online and rl keep my mind pretty busy.

Thanks to Voltek’s precious help and hints I recently managed to collect all the 300 hidden eggs of the Grid Wide Easter Bunny Hop Treasure Hunt.

Yep, 300 more objects and landmarks in my inventory.

Scary isn’t it ?

Especially since I still have to unpack the 232 gifts I had collected at the previous Valentine Love Hunt.

Unwrapping more than 500 items will certainly take some time and that is not the hardest part. When unpacking will be done, I will have to choose which one to keep and which one to throw away.

And let me tell you that I can be pretty slow at making up my mind.

I love these treasure hunts even if hopping from one shop to another, waiting for everything to rezz then starting to search for the (sometimes) extremely well hidden gift make it hard on these old eyes of mine.

Besides I have now this long list of shops just waiting for me to pay them another visit.

No wonder I have no time to blog.

People’s way

 People are all different

And God bless them for that.

In a field as specific and psychologically oriented as BDSM, one must imperatively be very careful in neglecting not to take these differences into consideration.

In rl, ignoring the basic fact that we are not made of the same stuff, that we don’t come from the same background and thus don’t enjoy the same things the same way, only leads to deep misunderstanding, bitterness, drama, frustration and can cause important damages both physical and mental.

There is a huge gap between people who merely enjoy to be restrained in a playful manner and those who consider themselves as slaves, thus allowing the Domme’s point of view totally rule over their own taste and will.

Except that it must involve consenting adult partners and that common sense safety rules must be followed, there is no general code of conduct precisely and clearly defining what a BDSM relationship should be.

This is impossible as it would mean that we all live according to the same cultural codes, share an identical background or suffer the same trauma, think the same way and crave for the very same sexual and emotional needs.

It just don’t work this way in rl !

So what about sl then ?

Hey we are talking about a world where a Domme can own more than a dozen subs at the same time, where you can spend hours if not days bound in a most stringent manner without having to suffer any physical consequences and where one jumps into a game even if she has just met her partner five minutes before.

Things are so different here.

Sometimes it bugs me that some people’s sole and only contact with BDSM has to take place in a world which rules and codes lack of the substance such a sensitive and intense way of being usually calls for and where individuals seem to have this tendency to think that everyone is sharing their point of view about the way things should be done.

I perfectly know that life makes it hard or impossible for many people to live out their fantasy or just to express their sexual inclination and I am sincerely happy for them to be able to enjoy the best our favourite pixel world has to offer.

But a few things should be kept in mind:

Dommes and subs:

Don’t expect people to always share your vision of how things should be conducted

Read profile and don’t forget to fill out yours. Introduce yourself and the way you do or see things.

Before playing, make sure that both parties have agreed on a safe code or a way to communicate “out of character”.

Dommes:

Don’t take everything for granted just because you are wearing a “Mistress” tag above your head. Real respect is gained and not forced.

It is not because someone is wearing cuffs that she is a slave Gorean style. Know who you are dealing with before playing.

Caring for someone is not a sin nor a weakness.

Subs:

Always have your RealKey in the hands of someone you trust, just in case.

Using a safeword or letting your Domme know that you don’t feel comfortable with what is going on doesn’t mean that you fail her.

When leaving your keys out, never forget that there is a strong chance that you are the only one to have read the “mutual consent” code of conduct and other rules of the sim you just entered.

Clearly indicate in your profile limits that imperatively have to be respected as many Dommes have their own peculiar way of interpreting the word “limit”.

People are all different.

And God bless them for that.

Nothing personnal

Well it seems that someone took what I wrote in my “Alone On Arrival” entry personally. I was just expressing my opinion and was far from criticizing anyone in particular, merely stating what I saw and heard in general and asking myself questions about a situation that, from my point of view, I find sad and puzzling. I was absolutely not referring to anyone in particular.

Moreover, my goal was absolutely not to interfere nor meddle into someone else second life, especially someone I hardly know . I never do this in RL and see no reason to behave like this in SL.

I will try to keep my entries as neutral as possible and keep my views, if any, for myself, certainly what I should have done since the beginning of this piece of blog.

Sorry

RP or not RP ?

I am not good at roleplaying.

I mean that I don’t play a character here, I am just being myself and when dealing with a specific situation I react the same way I would in RL.

With its exotic locations and its endless possibilities, I consider SL different and surrealistic enough of an universe for me to feel the need to roleplay a fictional character.

Of course, when actually “playing” a bdsm scene with someone, I will adopt the needed attitude like I do in RL but I am not a Domme 24 hours a day and I certainly don’t log in expecting to be whipping asses on a strict regular basis.

I know that some people come online to play and play again, considering SL as a big bondage video game and very often neglecting the other aspects of this virtual world. Socializing, exploring or simply chatting with friends are not included in their list of activities. I bear no grudge against these people and won’t dare to judge them.

I just see things a different way.

When chatting with someone I never know if this person is emotionally really reacting or just faking according to the character she chose to play and, most often than not, I have been surprised or puzzled by answers I received to some of my naïve questions. I don’t mix RL and SL, that’s not the point here but I can’t help believing what people tell me and react accordingly only to discover that they were just giving flesh to their character.

I guess I just have to get used to it.

That’s the reason why you won’t see me often in “official” rp sims like Deadend where everybody is supposed to actively and constantly be someone else. I am impressed by the fact that players go as far as having an entire forum devoted to the adventures their characters live where they share the last episodes of this dramatic serial.

I sincerely would love to join the fun but being a poor actress myself, I guess I merely would spoil the game. Besides I am far from being talented enough to compose these long and sophisticated sentences describing what my character is supposed to do as going only by dialogs doesn’t seem to be considered enough of a thrill.

“And Sarah puts her pen back on the desk and after reading this entry a last time, decides to post it, hoping deep in her heart that she won’t hurt anyone’s feelings”