When I take a look at my friends list, I realize how differently a relationship must be considered here in SL than in RL.
You meet someone, add her to your list then poof ! she vanishes for ever leaving her name and profile in your list as a mere souvenir. I sadly have to admit that I clean up my list every month, deleting people who seem to have disappear for good but can’t help keeping a few names in, hoping that, one day, their avatars will emerge again from the other side of the screen.
I know that RL being what it is, some people find it difficult to maintain their presence online and I definitely won’t blame them for that but, oh my, this is so hard sometimes and such a shock to come to understand that the lovely person you shared so many great memories with is simply not about to come back.
Before accepting any friendship offer or adding any new name to the list, one should check the amount of time the person spends online and, if about to leave for a while, the way she tells her friends in advance or not.
Some people are honest enough to indicate in their profile when and for how long they come online but many seem not to care that much.
I have noticed another disturbing element in the field of SL relationships, so strange a factor that it eventually makes me feel less and less inclined to consider any form of official and emotional partnership as a reasonable goal to achieve here.
When I meet a newly wed girl, a freshly collared sub or a Domme who recently became an owner, well, guess what ? they all long for their loved half who seems to have deserted the grid almost as soon as both sides agreed to take their romance to some official upper level.
Are people suddenly afraid of taking responsibilities ? do they feel cornered in a way or another ?
Hum, I don’t think so; my point of view is that people feel relieved, they don’t have to look for someone anymore, their search is over and thus, the reason for their presence online too.
They are now sure that someone do really care for them and went as far as making it official.
They reached the emotional status they were aiming at, consciously or not.
And sadly it seems that they consider it enough of an achievement to leave the grid thus breaking the heart of their wife, their sub or their Mistress.
Of course I also know lot of people still happily married and many subs whose collar gets all the daily attention it needs but still, I find the number of lonely avatars facing the horizon while waiting for the one they trust and cherish to return too big to be ignored nor neglected.
Makes me wonder.
Really.
